3 Weeks In

After my breakup with Kevin. I tried to get myself to work and tried to work through my days. I was in shock and denial and thought that this was just a dream that i would wake up from. But i never woke up. I decided to write down my feelings on paper and thought to myself maybe if i explained to him the reasons for my actions then he would forgive me.

So i spent 3 weeks working on writing all about the things i want in my life and the things i struggled with moving to NZ and the things that i figured would lead me to working things out with him.

3 weeks into it, he agreed to meet me. We met and i confessed all my insecurities and desires and apologies and his response to it all was that he wanted to forget it and move on.

I was crushed again. Not only crushed but all the hope that i used to survive the 3 weeks of waiting to see him again was removed and i was left with just a void and pain in my heart.

I left this encounter with what i can only describe as paralyzing agony.